Pumpkin Carving Brainstorms
Tonight is pumpkin carving night at the Cave of Eternal Suffering and Soul Rending, which is what our apartment is called when it’s Halloween, not because we’re having any marital difficulties.
I’ve only done two good pumpkins in my life. One was in 2nd grade at Hite Elementary’s pumpkin painting contest, which I won with a very awesome pumpkin painted to be one of the California Raisin backup singers. My dad did it for me, and all the kids knew it even though I didn’t tell them. It won and they hated me.* Also last year I carved a pretty decent Hobbes.**
Here are my ideas for this year:
- Hulk Hogan
- Shaggy 2 Dope
- A dragon that talks kidnapping a naked chick***
- Chris Hansen
- Grimlock
- Chris Hansen interviewing Shaggy 2 Dope in a kitchen while Shaggy 2 Dope tearfully explains that he was here to tell the 14 year old girl that they couldn’t be together like she wanted in that chat room
*and then in third grade he built a catapult for my science fair project and it won and people I went to third grade with still mention how mad it makes them to this day
**pretty decent by my standards
***also my lower back tattoo
